It can be easier to be in the world if you can just name yourself. Your suffering sometimes comes from the ways in which you’re desperately trying to plant yourself somewhere so that you can have an identity. You’re actually not this idea of a man, you’re much more than that. The message you keep getting and the experiences you keep receiving are that no, this is just an illusion. The rug keeps being pulled from under you. You come face-to-face with the ways in which you struggle really aggressively to solidify sexuality and gender, and the ways in which you believe in it so earnestly.įluidity challenges all of that. You’re brought into that realization very intimately and told to sit and experience what fluidity feels like. It’s a tradition that really confronts ideas of gender and sexuality through practices that help you to realize that these attributes, and identity in general, are quite fluid, and actually quite illusionary. Vajrayana Buddhism, Tibetan Buddhism, or Tantric Buddhism they’re all synonymous, though these days I prefer the term Tantric Buddhism. So going into retreat I came face to face with my sexuality. You’re actually moving deeper into the nature of these instincts and desires. People think becoming a renunciate is somehow avoiding the world, along with our instincts, appetites, and desires. The MOON: I’ve had other Buddhists tell me that monastic life, although celibate, really amplifies, or puts a lens on, sexual preoccupations because none of that energy is being expressed. When I eventually started meditating it was just a very natural thing in the house to do. All the people in the house were engaged in activism and social justice and a lot of them were either Buddhists and/or meditators. Lama Rod: I’d been living in an intentional community called Haley House in Boston, which was a community in the spirit of the Catholic Worker Movement. I simply accepted it and started planning to do a long retreat, confounding everyone in my life. All of a sudden I understood that this was what I was going to do. I’d never thought about it before had no aspirations no discernment process. I was reading a book, Cave in the Snow, about a woman, Tenzin Palmo, who did a 12-year solitary retreat, and I suddenly had the knowledge that “Oh, yes, I’m going to do that too.” It was as clear as daylight a split-second download. I say that because it was something that just awoke in me. ![]() The MOON: What motivated you to pursue that path? ![]() Lama Rod: “Lama” is the Tibetan word for the Sanskrit word “guru.” So lama in the Tibetan tradition means “teacher.” It connotes a certain spiritual weight, or gravitas, usually conferred after completing a three-year retreat by the teacher who guided you through the retreat. ![]() The MOON: Can you start by telling us a little bit about what it means to be a lama? At first our conversation explored navigating the edge between sexual attraction and commitment to social justice, then evolved into a conversation on sexual wisdom. Lama Rod spoke with me for over 90 minutes by phone. Because on the other side of fear is liberation.” He describes himself as “a formally trained Buddhist teacher working to be as open, honest and vulnerable as possible and help others do the same. As his website says, “With all your flaws and foibles, you’re lovable and deserving of happiness and joy.” As a Black, queer male, born and raised in the South, and heavily influenced by the church and its community, he understands our often conflicting identities. As he shares his stories and struggles with openness and gentle humor, he enables listeners to feel genuinely good about themselves. His gentle demeanor and willingness to bare his heart and soul make it safe for others to do the same. angel Kyodo williams and Jasmine Syedullah entitled Radical Dharma: Talking Race, Love and Liberation. As well as being a tantric Buddhist teacher, he also practices, studies, and teaches secular mindfulness and is a teacher with Inward Bound Mindfulness Education. He is active in social change work and co-authored a book with Rev. During his retreat he dealt with years of past pain and trauma and found forgiveness and compassion for himself, which he views as critical to being truly able to help others.Īfter completing his retreat he earned a Master of Divinity degree at Harvard Divinity School. Rod Owens earned the title “lama,” or teacher, from his own root teacher, the Venerable Lama Norlha Rinpoche, after completing the traditional three-year silent retreat program at Kagyu Thubten Chöling Monastery outside of New York City.
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